That was the moment everything changed
Over the next week, we did our homework.
Turns out Vernon wasn’t just proud—he was loudly proud. HOA meetings. Local council complaints. Long posts about neighborhood integrity. Property values. Visual harmony.
He loved rules.
What he didn’t love was following them as closely as he thought he did.
We learned that his backyard “privacy renovation”? Not approved. The oversized shed? Too close to the fence line. The floodlights he’d installed to illuminate his prized driveway? Against city ordinance. And that hose he used to freeze my car?
Left connected during freezing temperatures—explicitly prohibited. A fineable offense.
We didn’t call the police.
We didn’t confront him.
We mailed a package.
Inside was a neatly organized binder. Photos. Screenshots. Ordinance excerpts. HOA guidelines. A timeline. Everything clearly labeled.
On the front was a single sticky note:
